This is too long for FB and I don’t want a certain really nice German
guy to read it anyways cuz he’s friends with me there but not here. I
really hate posting on here through email, thus the lack of posts the
last couple weeks….
ANYWHO! So I hooked up with this German guy I’ve been friends with for
a few months now this past weekend. He’s been nothing but nice and
nonaggressive before and since. Think he really likes me actually.
Well in my travels in Europe, I noticed that European men are
distinctly less aggressive than American men at bars. This isn’t just
at my usual spot but everywhere I’ve gone for a drink. I say I’m
married and they back off. In America, I’d go to a bar with or without
my wasband (soon to be ex-husband) and a guy hit on me and no just
didn’t register with them.
I talked with some folks and they said the German women love the
American men because they’re so aggressive. My first thought, after
years of being subjected to manhandling, groping, being followed, etc.
has repeatedly been “thank god they’re not”. Then it dawned on me that
us American women are more aggressive than European women as well. But
we have to be in this sense. I actually scared the guy I hooked up
with cuz I felt threatened momentarily due to my intoxication level.
I’ve spent my adult life fighting off unwanted advances because I’m
nice and smart.
I’m not saying that there is no danger in Europe when going out. I’m
saying that how we are raised is completely different. How many of us
have had to get in a fight to keep someone away when out? I know I
have. We’re brought up to expect it, to think it’s normal for men to
be so aggressive. It’s not.
One thing I’m taking away from my time here in Germany is this: you do
not have to meet aggressive advances with aggressive actions, but
don’t take shit off anyone and always have a back way out of
something. That last bit is based on backfired plans in the middle of
trips with no phone service.
Now to shop for my Casey Jones gear to keep the American men away from
me when I get to the American bars.